If I knew nothing about unschooling and someone tried to tell me about it, if I were a stranger reading the essays here about unschooling, I would be profoundly skeptical. Unschooling sounds like bull shit. But it works. The children continue to show promising developmental progress. Their reading, writing, and thinking keep improving. Their world gets bigger and bigger as their bodies grow larger, and they are exposed to ever increasing ideas and information. They keep learning.
I suspect the explanation is simple. The reason most children show progress unschooling as well as in elementary school is because they are growing. Growing makes you smarter. Ad infinitum.
What about backwater uneducated hicks of all cultures left to grow on their own, will they get smarter? Yes, unless someone is trying to hold them back. The biggest cause of endemic stupidity is probably jealousy. That hallmark of low self esteem which gets passed down from parent to child, the attitude that equates bettering yourself with "putting on airs."
We've all experienced this, right? When you are watching someone walk a long (or reading their blog or meeting them or encountering their success) and the next thought is: "Look at her, she thinks she's so............pretty, smart, rich, awesome, etc" That is the moment reality is inverted and growth is squelched. Children raised with that attitude may never recover. Where can they go with the information that being special, standing out, striving, or simply living visibly well is frowned on? There is nowhere for them to go but down. It is a toxic and damaging mental loop and a prime cause, next to frank abuse, of generational stupidity.
lately I have thought that low self-esteem is the worst thing we can offer our children.
ReplyDeleteHow do we teach low self-esteem? Not giving them enough and giving them too much, both jump to mind. Neglect as well as pushing them too hard. Overly low and overly high expectations.
ReplyDeleteAside from abuse, of course. Am I seeing this correctly?
Correctly? who knows? not I. It's only just coming into focus for me, since I recently stumbled over how it feels to hold myself in positive esteem. (i.e.: Oh! So THIS is self-esteem. It's lovely.) And to have that value of self then permeate all my decisions and actions would be my goal for my kids, so that by how I live, I teach self-regard. If we love ourselves, it's hard to denigrate others. On bad days, I forget all that and sink into judgement. On good days, like today, I remember I am the author of this tale. I like this post of yours. I like it's honesty at the open, and then the searing quality.
ReplyDeleteneglect and high expectations... sounds like a really familiar disease.
ReplyDelete