There are three days between my Wednesday and Sunday cowgirl shifts. On the second Sunday the boss greeted me: "Did you enjoy your break?" Meaning, did I enjoy the three days between these two shifts. I looked at her and cocked my head quizzically and said yes. But the comment lingered. It took me a day to figure out why that innocent little question rang like a bell. The boss thinks milking is my job. She has no kids and therefore no way to imagine the truth. Farm work---what I get paid for? That's break time, gym time, and the time where I'm only responsible for keeping my body, 36+ cows, and a tank of milk safe.

The real job is Mothering. As hard as I work on the farm (as hard as absolutely possible) cowgirling is a sweet fiddle waltz compared to Mothering. I'm pausing this morning to savor the stillness and quiet and calm. This Weds./Sun. "break" will bracket a monakaleidocalliopeasoon of epicness. In these three days we will negotiate: meals, truth, a million brilliant leaves ablaze in the sun and winging across time in a race between beauty and decay, psyches, in-laws, parties, plumbers, allergies, and hopefully some hot cocoa. In short, very busyness.

But don't mistake the busyness for what matters, either. And don't worry, I know my children are well cooked and perfectly able without me. But the job of Mothering is kind of like Allen Greenspan's relationship with the United States economy. It was fine before him, it will be fine after him. But for a long time he refused to speak outside of his home, because everything he did and did not say mattered so much, changed people, altered courses.

We can minimize Mothering all we like. We understand children will grow and learn no matter what. But anyone who thinks they can disregard the importance, the subtleties, and the implications of the job are foolhardy and very dangerous. If you choose to no-show or abdicate your duty you will amplify suffering. Thich Nhat Hanh says we must learn how to suffer in order to relieve suffering. Just as true for Mothering, no more and no less. Trust me, cows are easier.

So yeah, I'm in the calm before the glorious storm. Our weekend is going to be very busy. Here is a nice little song to start things off in tune. Roseville Fair