Saturday, March 30, 2013

When the phone company (or whoever is responsible for such decisions) increased the numbers required to place a call from 7 to 10, I reprogrammed our phone so most of our contact numbers could be auto-dialed. (Please, who has time to dial 3 extra numbers? Wait, what does "dialing" even mean?) I spent about an hour learning how to program our phone and inputting numbers. That day, because I discovered such a thing was possible, I also added special ring tones in a completely random way. Which is not a secret code. When the phone rings, I do not know who is calling by the sound of the tone. That would require study, which I would never do. Or it would require the phone to ring a lot, which it almost never does. I loathe the phone to ring. I love my people. But I dislike anything which disturbs solitude. Most of our business is conducted through nice quiet civilized email. Half the time, our ringer is off. Though if a child from another family is here, or if my children are out, I make sure to turn the ringer on.

Learning to program my phone turned out to be equivalent to learning algebra. It took some time and effort. I know I can do it. I have no recollection of exactly how. So when the phone rang about 11 p.m. on a Sunday night a couple of weeks ago, I came up out of a sound sleep fairly certain our home was being attacked by an ice cream truck. And the family that was calling will always be easily identified in our home, now, as ice cream truckers.

Our family spends most of our social time with other homeschooling families, most of whom have practiced something called Attachment Parenting. I've mentioned this before, including that I very much regret not having heard of Attachment Parenting before I had babies. If I could do it all over again, I would do it that way. Our family arrived at an attachment orientation rather late, but in an organic and determined way. As far as I can tell, attachment creates feelings of belonging, security, self confidence, connection, love and more love. It turns out, flatly against everything society implies as parents are expected to put their babies into daycare and preschool, not to mention Head Start and regular elementary, attachment is a healthy and natural instinct.

My daughter's bff was sleeping over when the phone rang at 11 that night. Her little brother, who is about 8, wanted to say goodnight to her. He left a message, as it took us a few extra moments to get clear that our house was not being attacked by an ice cream truck, and we only needed to answer our phone. Dear bff called her brother back and we did not discover the message he'd left until a day or two later. In his very very sweet and sincere little voice he simply said, "This is me. I just wanted to say goodnight to my sister. Good night. I love you."

I may never erase it. Imagine such a world where siblings love each other so much and feelings are shared so openly. That is what attachment parenting creates.

1 comment:

  1. ice cream rules. thanks for a great laugh this AM, and more, yes more, welcome affirmation.

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